The Island Alien


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Thoughts on suicide in Trinidad and Tobago

quilb

This post seeks to broaden the epistemology of the greater society on the matter of life and suicide. In light of the passing of Chester Bennington, akin to other cases of suicide, society cries out “Suicide is the Easy way out” or “They should man up and deal with their problems”. In my opinion, these statements are considered to be foolish and thoughts of the ignorant. There are several theories out there that explain the reasons in which one might consider taking their life.

Studies carried out by Beck and the case studies by Lester (1998) have deduced the presence of an underpinning congruence between depression, the feeling of hopelessness and the thought of suicide. The thought of committing suicide is never the first that comes to mind. The human body is hardwired for survival, therefore one must endure a great deal of suffering to overcome this primal nature of…

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life update & toxicity

Oh man. I’ve been thinking a lot about too many things, recently. I feel like that is a thing I say too often. I can never calm this mind. There’s always a thought brewing here, an idea fermenting there, and several dreams and desires frolicking around somewhere. My brain can’t be still. I don’t know what the art of focusing means. The art of avoidance, though? Well, I’ve perfected it. I am the master of distracting myself. I do it so well, that recently, I started learning French instead of facing the things I have to face. Yes folks, I am just straight up learning to speak a new language. And that isn’t something easy, especially for me. I am terrible at learning languages. But here you can see the lengths I will go to, to avoid thinking about something that hurts.

I feel like my thoughts are all over the place. It’s just one of those things about me. Hi, I’m Julie and I’m a completely disorganized, disastrous mess of a person. I do online courses for fun, I start and forget countless DIY projects, I can barely finish anything I write, and I try literally anything to distract myself from real life.

So what’s been bugging me so badly that I’m currently on a quest to become bilingual? Toxic people.

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Vlogging

Hey guys! So I’m thinking of starting a vlog channel on YouTube to go alongside this blog as well. It’s gonna be hosted by me and my roommate and I will have a couple guests on (friends, acquaintances, etc), every 2 weeks or so.

We’re mainly gonna be talking about mental health issues, LGBTQIA+ issues, and general philosophy type stuff. I want it to be super conversational, just us chilling on a sofa, doing free talk, kinda thing.

At some point I wanna do an interview type video where I’ll be interviewing my boyfriend (who does not suffer from any mental illnesses), about his experience and challenges he faces about being with me (someone who does suffer from multiple mental illnesses). I would also like others to join in on this. So if you are close with someone who suffers from depression/anxiety/any other mental illness, or you ARE someone who suffers with one or a few of these, please contact me if you don’t mind being on the vlog itself, or you can even send me an email talking about your experience (as having one of these disorders, or as being close to someone who does).

We’ll be sharing these of course, and it’s up to you if you want to be completely anonymous.

If you, as someone who is mentally ill, have any tips for others on how to get through it, or any tips on how to be comforting for those who don’t know what it’s like, please feel free to send me a message!


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Professional learner.

When I was 3 years old, I started singing and dancing. I was obsessed with music and Indian culture. I was told by many people that I had a ‘natural talent’ for singing. I spent the next 12 years singing in competitions, appearing on television, and starting writing my own songs and thinking about the type of music I wanted to create. Eventually, I was told that these things were “hobbies”, and I needed to focus on a more realistic goal.

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Some people just aren’t going to have success stories, get over it.

I’m sure you’ve heard mental illness success stories. I mean, who hasn’t? Someone overcame severe depression, wrote an account of it, and we’re all here feeling happy for them, right? Someone speaks out on how terrible anxiety is, and we all feel sympathetic towards them, right? And that’s all well and good, but I wanna talk about something else today. I wanna talk about the people still struggling through their illnesses. The people like me and so many others who have to hear things like,

“You’ll get over it! I was reading about this woman who struggled for years but she’s fine now!”

“Why don’t you try this medication I’ve heard of? It worked for this guy I know!”

“You should get out more and meet people, or even meditate or exercise! I’ve heard that works.”

“You shouldn’t be on medication; you need to do cognitive therapy. That’s way better.”

Listen folks, none of these things are tried and true. None of these ‘solutions’ are guaranteed to work for every single person dealing with mental illness. And please don’t push someone else’s success story in my face.

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